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important, serve him. Be a humble servant. Live to serve him. That's what matters.

Jesus was telling me, that if I would humble myself to him, be a 'humble servant' to him, none of this would be happening. To follow him all the way, I needed to humble myself. At that moment for the first time, I felt humble and oh, how I wanted to serve him. Again, I realized that my life is not my own. Jesus helped me realize, that serving him, really is all that matters "Seek ye first, the kingdom of heaven" if I could only do that, I know every thing else, would just fall into place. I prayed to God to help me, to be a humble servant.

The next day, I awoke and guess what, the boys fought. I knew, I had to move them back into the house. Move my office back into the kitchen, and use the bungalow as a toy room. I informed them of this and told them that it would be happening over the following week. I had a real peace inside. I felt, as if I had finally given up the fight. I was so sick of fighting with God, on everything. Jesus helped me see this last night. Ever since I had become a Christian, I have fought with God, every step of the way, in the changes he has helped, make within me. He has always been right. His ways, have always been better and yet, I have continued to struggle and fight with every step.

A scripture in the bible came to my mind Gen 32:24-32. It tells of Jacobs's wrestle with God. I felt that this referred to me, and that my wrestling with God is finally over for now. Speaking with a friend from church, he told me the background information leading up to the wrestle. He started at the birth of Esau and Jacob. They were twin brothers who struggled against each other before they were born. I won't relate the whole story now but I was so amazed. I could see such a similarity between these two brothers and my own two sons. If you would like to read the scripture for your selves, it is Gen 25:19 –Gen 32:30. These two sons of mine have fought from day one. May-be we've all been wrestling with God and my eldest sons fight will soon be over too. I'm not sure about this one we will just have to see what unfolds.

The boys fighting continued. I felt it was a spiritual fight, with my younger son Shaun and Michael was receiving the brunt of it and then reacting to it, in his way. A couple of nights later I was on the phone to a friend. I had sent the boys to bed about half an hour before this. All of a sudden, they came out arguing. I finished my call, and Michael was very upset and he ended up stating, that he had had it and ran out the door. It was about 10:40pm, as I had gone to cell group, the