Debb's Christian Share Page

 

It was after this, that God showed me who he was. (As in the First Chapter of this book)- It was so great, I started off there and have worked backwards, because that was such a turning point for my Christian walk.

Revealing himself to me in that way gave me a faith and a trust, so much greater than any I'd had before. It made me feel so safe and I just knew, that he will never let me go.

From this point, God has moved quickly in my life. If you think the first half of this book has been exciting; just in knowing, this Great and awesome God, through his precious Son, Jesus. (Well, I hope you have found it exciting), this next half is even more so. As you will see, Our God is an Amazing God- He is the Great I AM.

Rom. 8:5 Those who live as their human nature tells them to, have their minds controlled by what human nature wants.

I had been trying for a couple of weeks now to let go of my feelings of hanging on to my ex-husband. I was just so sick of the pain my hanging on caused me. I took it to God and asked him to help me with it again. Over the next couple of weeks I tried hard to let go, but I found the harder I tried, the harder I hung on. The more I tried the more impossible it became. In the end, I spoke to my friend about it. She said, "Debbie have you ever asked God to show you how to let go?" I said, "No. I usually tell him what I will do and ask him to help me with it."

I soon realized how ridiculous I had been and how so typical, that way was for me. That night I went to bed and prayed to God to show me how. I told him that I couldn't do it. I didn't know how.

A couple of days later, I was hanging washing on the line, when all of a sudden, I felt such a deep sense of repentance. I was so sorry for all the terrible things, I had done to my husband, during our years together and I sought forgiveness. I then prayed for my ex-husband. This began to play on my mind. I began to feel regret, because I knew, that I was no longer that same person anymore. I wished I had known then, what I know now, but it was too late. Our marriage was over and had been for a long time.

I went to God that night full of pain. Pain, because it was just too late. I found it so hard, to face the fact that, we don't always get a second chance at everything, that some times, we have to learn by our mistakes and take the consequences. It reminded me, of the night before my husband and I separated. He told me, that he had met someone else and that he was leaving. We talked for about half an hour, I was just so shocked. When we finished talking, he went in to have a shower. I just sat there, stunned, when all of a sudden, everything I had ever done wrong in my marriage, flashed before my eyes, like a movie. All these different scenes flashed by. It was like I had heard sometimes, when people are facing possible death, their life flashes before their eyes. Well, that is what happened to me and it happened in a split second. In that split second, I knew the biggest mistake I had made, was talking everything for granted. I took my husband, my children, and life it's self for granted. I couldn't believe, that I could see it all, when it was over and I couldn't believe now, that it was too late.

When my husband got out of the shower I begged him not to go, that I knew, I just new where I had gone wrong, but he said, it was too late. I never excepted it, here I was now, faced with the same thing, and again I couldn't accept the fact that it was over for good.